the watch of time

Clichés Upgraded – Part XI

That time again, another batch of enlivened clichés (with the original in italics):

• New research has shown that being as happy as a clam is really a shell game
• The cook left her baking on the cold window sill, accidentally creating icing on the cake (more…)

Memorable Quote # 15

                       If I didn’t love the material, I would have taken a job

as a piece of cardboard in a wino’s shoe instead of an album jacket…                                                                                                                                                          I know a person with your sense of the bizarre must have lots to do. But, (more…)

Clichés Upgraded – Part X

Here we go, another batch of enlivened clichés (with the original in italics):

• Did you hear about the horticultural investor who had mixed feelings about his account portfolio growing like a weed?
• He couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn because of endless respect for its interior wall hangings (more…)

Clichés Upgraded – Part IX

And yet again, a batch of enlivened clichés (with the original in italics):

• If we had three of them, getting off on the wrong foot wouldn’t be a big problem
• I know a show-off ballplayer who will play any position, and he’ll handle it with kid gloves (more…)

Clichés Upgraded – Part VIII

Yet again, a batch of enlivened clichés (with the original in italics):

• Eight auto workers being let go while standing on the front hood of a truck is firing on all cylinders
• Get out of Dodge and go into another auto maker’s vehicle if that makes you happy (more…)