Creative commentary plus crafty composition

Archive for February, 2016

Clichés Upgraded – Part LI

 

The end of Leap Year February is on the horizon, so time to ‘march’ on with updated clichés (with originals in italics):

  • You may have rehearsed your delivery, but the resounding silence votes that’s no joke
  • Because of the inevitable change in their composition, things aren’t what they used to be
  • We threw a curve ball for them, since the dancers are all fans of baseball (more…)

Little Known Government Budget Measures

 

With both the Canadian and Ontario governments releasing budgets this past week, it’s interesting to scrutinize some proposed measures which seem to have slipped by initial reporting

  • Potholes in roads outside municipal jurisdiction will be eligible for naming rights once they are filled in
  • Visitors to the respective Parliament buildings will be permitted to claim a recycling credit for any loose garbage or flyers they pick up and take away
  • Voting on suggested themes for $9 and $19 circulation coins will commence later this year (more…)

What Is Suitable

 

News item:  The mayor of Coquitlan, British Columbia, stated in a recent interview that he wore the same suit (with occasional dry cleanings) for fifteen months, and no one noticed, at meetings or other gatherings; when asked if this would contrast strongly with the reaction a woman would receive if she tried to do the same thing, he concurred.

Imagine if this ‘male advantage’ applied in other ways(more…)

Remember Me

It is supposedly a truism that in a group of thirty people, at least two will share the same birthday.  I have been witness to this anecdotally, but how accurate it is over a scientifically large sample is unclear.

What is unequivocally accurate is that a birthday is, by definition, the most important day in one’s life.  It seems like it should be worthy of some recognition. (more…)

Nominating Hits and Misses

 

Anyone watching the unfolding drama of the nomination process in American politics no doubt finds a number of elements striking, whether or not one lives there.  Like it or not, whoever emerges will be the most powerful leader of the western world.  Hopefully, voter reason will reign during the elimination process, working through omnipresent framing by pervasive media and behind-the-scenes political machinations. (more…)

TOP 10 ‘Coping with Winter’ Activities (revisited):

 

For those of us coping with life in cold & snowy climes, especially after a snowmageddon…

  • Cut holes in the ice and hunt for lost coins
  • Learn to hibernate
  • Hide things where you can find them so you’re constantly getting warm looking
  • Plant snowballs, melt more snow to water them, and see if they grow (more…)

Applications from Binge Watching

 

Yesterday, for the first time, I binge watched a TV show: season one’s ten episodes of Better Call Saul were run, prior to its launching of season two later on last evening.  (The host speciality channel, AMC, has made a habit of such volume-based indulgences, including with its other hit series The Walking Dead and Breaking BadBetter Call Saul actually intended as a prequel to the latter.) (more…)

Another TOP 10 Lesser Valentine’s Day Sayings

 

The day is here

  • A kiss makes the heart feel young, but there may still be a role for Botox and a facelift
  • I’m like a kid back in kindergarten, I send out Valentine’s cards with postage due
  • It may be a love-bite, but I’m going to get a shot for it just in case (more…)

TOP 10 Lesser Valentine’s Day Sayings

 

In anticipation of the special day forthcoming this weekend

  • If you live to be 100, I’ll know to keep the insurance claim handy
  • They invented hugs to let people know you love them and that your arm exercises have been working
  • The hours I spend with you are like a perfumed garden, which is unlucky as I have an allergy to strong scents (more…)

Being Humourous Without Boundaries

 

An article in the current month’s edition of Toastmaster magazine addresses a tricky issue in the field of humour: managing to be funny while minimizing negative cultural fallout.

As those who have given talks outside their native land (or even to sectors within it) have come to recognize, what’s funny here may not be considered funny there. (more…)