Creative commentary plus crafty composition

Archive for 2015

TOP 10 Bizarre City By-Laws & Policies

The City of Ottawa has followed again this summer a policy of closing beaches well before the end of August, when it not only normally remains quite warm, but also as this year when it can be steamy hot; what other policy gems are there?

  • If you find paper money on the street, it must be thrown in the nearest garbage can for health reasons
  • Remember that parking on downtown streets is a privilege, regardless of merchants’ dependency for customers, so any restrictions or charges are fair
  • When the mayor shows up for a photo-op, it means there is highly important city business (more…)

Category:

Humour, Social & political humour

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Memorable Quotes # 29

On Resolving:

If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.

We must risk going too far to discover just how far we can go.

On Skills & Fundamentals:

Success is neither magical nor mysterious.  Success is the natural consequence of consistently applying basic fundamentals. (more…)

Category:

Social & political commentary

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TOP 10 Uncommon Form Evaluations  

Almost any business or professional development event seems to request that attendees complete an evaluation form; here are subjects with customized rating scales…

  • The venue was accessible with good acoustics (rate: Imax quality to laundry mat competitor)
  • There was enough ‘elbow room’ between seats in the auditorium (rate: very comfortable to squashed)
  • The opening session set high expectations with incentives to learn (rate: laudable to pedestrian) (more…)

Category:

Humour, Social & political humour

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TOP 10 Wistful Responses to Rude Situations

This morning we found ourselves temporarily trapped behind a driver parked illegally in front of the train station entrance, who wanted us to shift dangerously past him so he wouldn’t have to move…

  • When waiting to complete a retail transaction because the clerk turns to some other activity, take out your pen and give yourself a negligence discount
  • If stuck in a lineup because the too few service counters are operating at a snail pace, broadcast a live news flash for local media
  • Have waiting passengers hold a meeting in front of a private vehicle blocking the transit entrance (more…)

Category:

Humour, Social & political humour

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TOP 10 Yin & Yang with Having Summer Visitors

Whether it be relatives or friends, there are pros and cons when folks come to visit during the summer

  • New slants on endless talks about the weather
  • Fewer excuses to avoid visiting overlooked local sites
  • The excitement of anticipating their arrival evolves to the excitement of anticipating their departure (more…)

Category:

Humour

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Clichés Upgraded – Part XXXVIII

We are now in the August presence of more enlivened clichés (with the original in italics):

  • We’ve been notified that the rolling stone gathers no moss until well enough compensated
  • The blast of air was for such a short time it was called a second wind (more…)

Category:

Humour

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Memorable Quotes: Tales of Screenwriters – Part Eighteen

The ‘Players’ – performers:

(a) “If you want actors to listen to everything you say, get unknown actors. If you are lucky enough to work with film stars, you find there’s a reason why they’re film stars. They tend to be incredibly smart people… If you’re lucky enough to make a picture with these people, you’re gonna listen to what they have to say, and you’re gonna accommodate a lot of what they have to say…” (more…)

Category:

Arts commentary

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Memorable Quotes # 28

On Government & Politics:

It can be dangerous to weaken the strong in our attempts to strengthen the weak.

The real genius to make a marketplace flourish doesn’t come from the government.  It comes from the individual genius of its people. (more…)

Category:

Social & political commentary

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The Not-Just-In-An Elevator Speech

The August issue of Toastmaster magazine features an article written by a woman whose profession involves developing “the voice of experts who want to broaden their impact”.  In the article she speaks about the marketing tool known as ‘The Elevator Speech’. (more…)

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Social & political commentary

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TOP 10 Reasons for an Extra-Long Election Campaign

This morning, in the middle of a summer holiday weekend, Canada’s Prime Minister officially launched the Federal Election Campaign for the vote October 19th – why so early?

  • More opportunity for practicing those barbequing skills at public events
  • Lots of time to massage the message that extra taxpayer-funded spending is just a way of paying for a staycation
  • More frequent flier points for candidates, staff, and media (more…)

Category:

Humour, Social & political commentary, Social & political humour

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