the watch of time

It’s the last official week of summer, so here’s to enjoying it with more enriched clichés (with the originals in italics):

• I know they like to personify their gun collection, but having a shotgun wedding is too much
• After the intimidating speaker moved the listeners to silence the crowd relaxed with the sound of the lunch bell
• As an animal imitator he goes the whole hog from being healthy as a horse to acting sick as a dog
• I know letter writing skills aren’t what they once were but it shouldn’t be hard to keep the right order of signed, sealed, and delivered
• Since you have no more money or cashables to invest in the project, all that’s left is to sink your teeth into it
• Silence is golden compared to all the work in dealing with the silver lining or the brass ring
• To cool off, we can dip our heads and arms in the sink or swim in the neighbours’ pool when they’re away
• Sauntering on connected stove parts is dangerous, so you better shuffle off this mortal coil
• Did you see the cartoon where Elmer Fudd calls “Shut your hole” when he catches Bugs Bunny trying to escape?
• The interspecies section is over there, where your friend is already sitting in the catbird seat