the watch of time

This coming Sunday brings about another Father’s Day.

As many of us know, especially men who are fathers, this day historically takes a back seat to Mother’s Day on the recognition, celebration radar.

That’s not necessarily bad; after all the fuss and commotion concomitant with Mother’s Day, parents not having to go through a similar scenario only a month or so later can feel less of an ordeal, as long as dads can roll with the lower profile.

That doesn’t mean low-balling the occasion should be the norm. Indeed, it provides an opportunity for the truly creative spirit to bypass the promotional rote of Fathers’ Day socks or ties or shaving kits or power tools or golf equipment.

Here are some ideas on the unexpected side, which might fit that special dad:

• Unlabelled hops collected from a hundred craft brewers
• A do-it-yourself combination footstool and food tray, with potentially comprehensible instructions for a games sideboard
• A dart board with six attachable pictures of dad’s least favourite athlete or politician, complete with a sound system in the board which begs for mercy at each hit
• A single remote control for all electrical devices in the home, which operates on energy built up through dad’s continual device clicking
• BBQ smoke deflecting shirts
• An inflatable, realistic, doppelganger to be taken out whenever dad just can’t deal with another unwelcome sales pitch at the door
• A gift card designed with pleats, which open eight-fold into a tent, ensuring the card should be good for something
• A personalized diorama of dad’s office or meeting room, so he can really feel like being in charge
• Coin encrusted pants’ pockets, which help hold heavy accumulations while providing a silver lining
• For the dad who wants a man-cave, start him up with a rare velvet print of dogs sitting around a campfire chewing on golf balls